A third of American teens experience physical, sexual, or emotional abuse from a partner before they reach adulthood. That’s why every February is recognized as Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. If you are parenting an adolescent, it is important to understand teen dating violence (TDV) and the impact it can have on your child’s mental health. At Carolina Dunes Behavioral Health in Leland, North Carolina, we provide mental health treatment for teenagers, many of whom have experienced this form of intimate partner violence.
Types of Teen Dating Violence
When people think about the abuse a young person can experience at the hands of a significant other, they may not realize the full spectrum of behaviors that can be included. There are four types of TDV:
- Psychological violence. In one study, around 65 percent of young people reported experiencing this form of TDV. This can be in the form of name-calling or playing manipulative mental games.
- Physical violence. About one in 12 girls and one in 20 boys are victims of this form of TDV each year. LGBT+ youth are at higher risk. This type of violence may include hitting, kicking, or throwing things at the person.
- Stalking. Around half of all young people experience this form of TDV, which may include following or giving unwanted attention.
- Sexual violence. Around ten percent of girls experience this form of TDV each year. The percentage is lower for boys, but there are still male victims. LGBT+ youth are at increased risk. Sexual violence may include forcing someone to engage in sex acts against their will or pressuring someone to perform a sex act.
Sometimes, TDV happens through digital media. This can involve sending a partner lewd messages they do not wish to receive or posting pictures that the other person does not wish to have online. Social media can also make it more difficult for a victim to escape their abuser.
Causes of TDV
A teenager’s brain and coping skills are still developing. They may not be ready to manage intense experiences that can come along with dating, such as:
- Jealousy
- Anger
- Rejection
- Shame
- Conflict
In addition, they may struggle to recognize the difference between a healthy amount of romantic interest and stalking or controlling behaviors.
Long-Term Impact of TDV
People who experience intimate partner violence in adolescence are more likely to:
- Be abused by partners as adults
- Struggle with depression
- Experience anxiety
- Develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Struggle with eating disorders
- Engage in self-harm
- Misuse alcohol and other drugs
- Have thoughts of suicide
What Parents Can Do to Help
The research on TDV has found that parents can have an impact on their child’s likelihood to perpetrate and be victimized by TDV:
- Exposure to domestic violence within the family increased risk
- Young people who had positive interactions with their parents were at decreased risk
- Teens who were taught constructive ways to manage conflicts about money were at decreased risk
- Youth who had good mental health and received support for mental health struggles were at decreased risk
Parents can also teach their children how to respond if they experience TDV:
- Tell someone. Abusers often convince their victims that the abuse is their own fault, making them too ashamed or fearful to ask for help. Teaching your child that victims of abuse deserve help and support will make it easier for them to escape an abusive relationship.
- Document the abuse. Victims, whether they are adults or adolescents, should write down what is taking place, photograph injuries, and seek medical attention. Print out emails, texts, or other abusive communications. This will make it easier to obtain protective orders.
- Leave the relationship. Relationships can progress from unhealthy to abusive very quickly. If you aren’t sure how to leave a relationship, a trusted adult or crisis line can help.
If you are worried that a young person in your life could be in an abusive relationship, we encourage you to talk to them right away about the things that are causing you to have these concerns. At Carolina Dunes Behavioral Health, we recognize that TDV and other forms of intimate partner violence may be an underlying factor in our patients’ behavioral health struggles, and we respond with compassion and trauma-informed care.
