When you think about the upcoming holiday season, what feelings do you experience? Is it excitement about engaging in annual traditions and seeing extended family members? Are you focused on a lengthy to-do list? Is there anxiety and worry about how you’ll navigate the next couple of months? Are you struck by sadness and grief because there are people who are no longer present to celebrate with you?
At Carolina Dunes Behavioral Health, we know that the “most wonderful time of the year” can take a toll on mental health, which is why we want to offer some suggestions for taking care of yourself during the holidays.
Naming Your Stressors
You aren’t alone if the holidays take a toll on you. Sixty-four percent of people with mental illness who were surveyed by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) stated that the holidays made their symptoms worse. Don’t wait until you’re hurting to try to find a solution. Make a list now of the things that steal your joy at the holidays. Whether it’s increased contact with a certain negative person, disruptions to your routine, financial concerns, or a half dozen other things, write it all down. Then think about what specific events are likely to trigger these stressors. In some cases, the fact that there are so many different events could be the trigger.
Identifying Solutions
Once you have a list of concerns for the holiday season, you can more easily identify what self-care you will need to maintain or implement to prevent yourself from becoming overwhelmed by difficult feelings. Some examples might include:
- Setting (and sticking to) a firm budget for holiday spending
- Recognizing places you may be tempted to overspend and making a prevention plan
- Planning to keep lots of healthy food options around, so that you aren’t tempted to overindulge in foods that don’t support your sense of well-being
- Leaving events early if they will interfere with your sleep schedule
- Taking an emotional support person with you to events you need to attend, but are worried about handling alone
- Skipping events that include a problematic person, where you may feel pressured to consume alcohol, that bring you more stress than happiness, or that are just adding to your to-do list, with little return on your investment
- Attending your regularly scheduled therapy appointments and support group meetings, even when you may be tempted to skip
- Scheduling time for the things that bring you peace the rest of the year, such as physical exercise, meditation, hobbies, journaling, spiritual practices, or enjoying a good book or movie
- Declining invitations where you will be required to be around more people than you’re comfortable interacting with
- Having an “escape plan” for leaving events, handling your own transportation, staying sober, or having an excuse for your departure, such as an early morning the next day or needing to be somewhere else
- Hosting your own events, if the gatherings you would normally attend are not good for your mental health
- Having a moment of remembrance for the people who you are missing
- Take proactive steps to manage seasonal depression
Setting Boundaries
Once you recognize what you will need to do to take care of yourself during the holidays, you might find that you need to set some boundaries with people in your life. This may be met with resistance or frustration in some cases, but this doesn’t mean you’re wrong to do what you need to do in order to maintain your own peace. You aren’t required to sacrifice your own well-being to make other people happy.
Getting Support During the Holidays
If you find that you are still struggling during the holidays, reach out for help:
- Call your therapist
- Contact your spiritual advisor
- Meet with your sponsor
- Join a support group
- Look for online communities where you can talk to other people with similar struggles
- Reach out to a family member or friend who understands you
- Call or text 988 for crisis support
At Carolina Dunes Behavioral Health in Leland, North Carolina, we help adolescents, adults, and families who need acute care to manage psychiatric symptoms or mental health crises. We also help our patients and their loved ones to set up ongoing care, to ease their transition back into their homes and communities following discharge from our program.
